It has been four weeks now since my mother passed. The emotions that I have experienced have been many. I miss her greatly and will mourn awhile longer, this I know. She was a woman who meant so many things to me, a mother, a friend, a soul that I could have intense conversations with about many things, including transformative topics. I will miss my talks with her as well as my knowing that she is there for me in so many ways.
The passing of my mother has made me think about a lot of things. My mortality for one, somehow knowing that my death is very real and something that I will eventually experience. I was there to watch her leave this realm of existence, when she took her last breath. I know that we are not immortal in this sense, that I too shall past at some point. I am now much more present to his fact. Some of us forget this point, or do not consider it, and as a result live our life as if we will live forever.
Such insight and awareness has gotten me to again reevaluate my purpose for being here, on this planet and as a human being. More than even I know that we are just renting everything that we have materialistically, that we own nothing, and that what matters, truly matters, is other people, to be of service, specifically. The highest purpose of a human being is to be of service to others. All we have is this and our love for others, it is all that truly matters. To live our life as if we will live forever is to miss the point. We must die before we die, as Tolle wrote. As mother once told me about my father, my father passing two years before her, he did not even take his pajamas with him.
Much of who we bring into our life is a reflection of our inner conversation about ourselves as well about others. Below are some positive affirmations that can assist you in manifesting the type of relationship that you truly want to bring into your life.
1. I am loving, lovable and loved.
2. I accept others for who they are and who they are not.
3. I joyously forgive others and myself and I set myself free from the past. I am at peace.
As human beings we do not really want or like to change. We like for things to be the same, for us not to have to put forth much effect to have what we say we want. We do not want to change and even, will resist change especially if another human being attempts to help us. Yes, we do change but we have to first get it that we do not want to change. Accepting our resistance is important for the process. We must first accept the fact that we will resist change in order for us to take it into consideration in our planning to transform our lives. It is important for us to plan and to make goals but it is equally important for us to plan how we will resist the process, will resist our achieving the goals we set. Such planning gives us power to respond appropriately when needed.
In my work in recovery I counsel people in how to recognize when they are resisting, when they are doing things to counter the goals they set and say they want. Such insight is important and necessary if individuals are to say in the program of recovery. The resistance will also show up in the very suggestions that are given, by a sponsor or therapist. The tendency is not only to resist but to continue to do it his or her way, with the results usually the same, much of how it was in the past. Our tendency is to try to do things and life our way, even when we continue to get the same results.
Below are listed ten positive affirmations for anyone in recovery from surgery. While positive affirmations are very powerful, this power can be enhanced by using them with therapeutic relaxation music.
1. I am healthy and filled with energy.
2. My body restores itself ow to its natural state of good health.
3. I am perfect, whole and complete.
4. Every cell of my body is healthy.
5. My body heals quickly and easily.
6. I love and accept myself exactly as I am.
7. I joyously release the past. I forgive. I am at peace.
8. I always take good care of myself.
9. My body is strong and healthy, I am strong and healthy.
One of the projects that I have long thought about doing is to read and compare, possibly with the intention of writing something at some point, the Big Book and maybe even Basic Text, with authors such as Louise Hay, Wayne Dyer, E. Tolle, Don Miguel Ruiz, Donald Walsh, and Dan Millman. The intention would not be to rewrite recovery but merely to explore and discover other resources that could assist a person in his or her recovery and ultimately his or her transformation. The Big Book is a very powerful writing and the authors mentioned above have a profound message for the transformation of the world and life itself.
The intention of a study group like what I am creating, as it nows move closer to realization, would also be to report or comment on what is discovered and to do so in this blog. I am now in the process of creating the study group, so to speak, and then after the process begins, to write about it here. I would also invite others to join in, to write and make comments on the blogs which they believe are relevant to the purpose of the project.
Part of my commitment and intention out of this project will be to not only share that which is discovered, the knowledge and insights, but to convert that understanding into something practical, something that can be used by others, to be of service to all of mankind.
One of the keys to transformation is to honor our commitment to transforming our life. Once we create the intention to transform we set into motion the particulars and specifics of what it will take for us to create the life that we say we want. Such a process will involve having integrity, staying to that which we say we will do, completing it the way it was supposed to happen and doing that which we need to do to its completion.
Once we set this process into motion things may start to happen. No, they will happen, roadblocks will appears where before there were none. Things will happen in life, things will appear as though they are blocking our transformation. Our work is to move through them, to accept things as they are, to give up our resistance to how things are, to surrender, and to push on anyway.
One of the barriers or constraints that we will be confronted with will not be about other people, places and things. Rather, the roadblock will be something we generate. It will be our very thoughts and beliefs, thoughts and beliefs that we have about ourselves. We will create the limits to that which we live our life, and we will do so with respect to and in conflict with our intention to transform our life. What it will take is for us to stay present to our commitment and even in the face of our self limiting belief, transform who we think we are, who we are to ourselves and the world. We simply have to do the work.
Daily Homework can make the difference in ones transformation and recovery. Here are four additional Principles for transformation your life.
1. Acknowledge yourself and others daily. Acknowledge the miracles in your life. Practice affirming that every moment of your life is a miracle.
2. Practice patience! Remember that you are doing the best you can. At the moment that we do we do the best we can. When you know ore, you will do things differently. Do this in regards to others too. Always do your very best.
3. Share with others what you are getting out of your transformation and recovery.
4. Stay hungry for your transformation and recovery.
One of the most powerful of principles is that of acceptance. Acceptance creates possibility in your life. For me acceptance is the key to recovery and transformation. It is that from which we experience of sense of serenity and peace, and with it our power as human beings. Without acceptance we are at the mercy of life happening.
Below is one of the most powerful passages that exists. The passage on acceptance comes from the Big Book, page 449 in the third edition and 417 in the fourth edition.
“And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation – some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober, unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.”